Instructions found online sent us to the settings on Neil’s phone where we found a list of everything that had used the battery in the last week. It turned out two or three apps were the primary culprits in draining his phone’s energy. They weren’t essential apps and could be completely removed without having much impact on how Neil used his phone. So, he removed them, and his phone has been serving him well since.

That situation brought to mind something I learned when in coach training about “tolerations.” The way the word "tolerations" was being used in my coach training was new to me, but I found the new meaning quite useful. 

A toleration, in this sense of the word, refers to something one dislikes in one’s experience  but tolerates instead of taking action to eliminate. Like the hungry apps on Neil’s phone, a toleration lurks out of sight and conscious thought, all the while draining one's energy. 

Tolerations can be large or small. They can be like the four burned-out bulbs currently in four different multi-bulb fixtures in our house. We are functioning well enough without them. They bother me, but apparently not quite enough for me to get out the ladder and replace them. Neil is not particularly bothered by the burned-out bulbs, even though he might be able to replace them without using a ladder. 

Each time I notice those light bulbs, a little of my energy goes into imagining how that problem could be resolved and, truth be told, some of that energy is probably going into irritation that Neil hasn’t just taken care of the situation already. These light bulbs are a toleration for me, but they aren't for Neil. In fact, he thinks we're getting along fine without them and are saving energy! So one person's toleration may not be an issue for another person who may have different tolerations draining his energy.

How many tolerations are we living with without even knowing that they are sapping our energy and creativity? I wonder if those of us with ADHD might live with more tolerations than neurotypical folks. We focus most of our attention on the present moment, but some part of our awareness knows about the tasks that have been accumulating at work and at home that are not getting done. The sub-conscious awareness of those things we are avoiding is sapping our energy, holding us down, limiting our freedom.

What can you think of in your life that is a toleration? For example, what has been on your ToDo list for weeks, draining a bit of your energy each time you read it over, berate yourself, and bemoan the fact that it is still undone?

It’s spring! Maybe your spring cleaning could include a cleaning out of a few tolerations, either by actually deciding to just do them or by deciding they don’t really need to be done and removing them from your list. Each toleration that is resolved will act like a little charge to your battery, leaving you with more energy for tasks that really matter to you!

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